Filling in the Branches of the Family Tree

(I should preface this entry with a confession: My on-again status regarding my family tree is due entirely to the fact that I am so easily swayed by things on television. Eli swears I should be a marketing test subject, because I respond so strongly. NBC has started showing a new season of "Who Do You Think You Are" which is basically one long commercial for www.ancestry.com and after the first episode I immediately jumped on and started filling out a tree. I have promised myself that if I make enough progress on my own I will purchase a one month subscription so I can actually see and print all the documents I am searching through.)


Since my early teen years I have held an on again, off again interest in my family tree. I have always loved history (eventually deciding to minor rather than major in the subject in college once political science had wooed me away) and exploration of the family tree is a very personal way to experience history. I shared this genealogical interest with my Great Aunt Corinna, sister to my Gran, and someone I honestly didn't spend much time with. However, when she learned of my interest, she was pleased enough to share what I consider to be treasured documents with me. Through much hard work and many hours of combing through records, Aunt Corinna had compiled a a family tree (well specifically one very long branch) of her father's (my great grandfather's) line. And by very long, I mean the the first entries date back to 1146 ad.

I know, it seems hard to believe. Certainly hard to believe that one could trace their heritage back accurately to such a distant point in history. But it seems that such things happen more than I would have suspected. In the case of this branch, accuracy can be depended upon because this branch had historical significance. I was told Aunt Corinna went no further back than William Marshall of England because she believed he was an orphan. My recent research reveals that in fact there is a record of William Marshall's parents, and I am excited to start researching a bit further back.

So who is William Marshall? Well, according to multiple sources, "Sir William Marshal, 1st Earl of Pembroke (1146 – 14 May 1219), also called William the Marshal (Guillaume le Maréchal), was an Anglo-Norman soldier and statesman. He was described as the "greatest knight that ever lived" by Stephen Langton. He served four kings — Henry II, Richard the Lionheart, John and Henry III — and rose from obscurity to become a regent of England for the last of the four, and so, one of the most powerful men in Europe. Before him, the hereditary title of "Marshal" designated head of household security for the king of England; by the time he died, people throughout Europe (not just England) referred to him simply as "the Marshal"." Specific to me, he was my great (x29) grandfather. Yes grandfather 29 generations back.

This is very exciting for me, since I particularly love English history, but also because it makes following the family tree down to my grandmother's family much easier because the children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, and on down the line of William Marshall were members of the royal family or at least members of Court. They married other noblemen and noblewomen, and essentially kept themselves in the record books for long enough that by the time history stopped caring about them we have come forward enough in time that Aunt Corinna could and I can verify their offspring easily by more conventional methods.

Having such a huge head start on one branch of my tree has motivated me to learn as much about the rest of my family as I can. This will be much harder work though for two reasons; first, I have no one forging ahead of me to give me so much to go on, and second, estrangements on both sides of my family (some before my time and others involving me) make it hard to get information that normally you could just call an older family member up and ask about.

Despite those obstacles, I have made some progress. I have learning things in conversation with my father and grandfather that I never knew. I have found that my paternal great great grandmother used to be a telephone operator in the old switchboard days. I have learned I have many farmers in my family, on both sides, and a few coal miners too. I have learned that distant relations on my mother's side helped to form the state of Maryland. All of it is fascinating to me. Everything from the knights to the miners is a little piece of my history. I cannot wait to find out more.

P.S. If I can figure out how to make an image you can actually see, I will post a picture of the hand-written tree my Great Aunt Corinna gave me all those years ago. It is beautiful, and a testament to the hard work she did to provide this information for our family. It is several feet long and all done it tiny, perfect script.

Dirt

Boys get dirty. Little boys seem to make their top priority finding any kind of dirt or mess and covering themselves in as much of it as possible. It isn't to say little girls don't get dirty too. I never had a brand new pair of white tennis shoes that didn't find a huge mud puddle within days (sometimes hours) of purchase. If there was a puddle within a 100 feet of me, I would manage to fall into it. Craft time meant paint, glue and glitter on the elbows of my shirts and somewhere on my pants. But I would argue that my dirt interaction as a little girl was more a by product of my play or lack of attention on my part, where as with little boys (and specifically my son) dirt seems to be the aim from the get-go. Playtime is what happens when you busy making a mess.

Turns out I am a bit of control freak about messes. (NO! Say it ain't so- not you! Yeah yeah...) If going purely on instinct I would have a wet wipe always in my hand and my son would be playing outside wrapped in plastic. He would have come out of the womb knowing how to use utensils and place his napkin neatly in his lap. And I don't get it. I am not a super neat person. I am controlling and want to be the boss of many, many things- but I wouldn't consider neatness to be high on that list. I was a horrible slob as a child. My room was the stuff of legend. But somehow with the birth of this child, a switch has been flipped. I clean his toys up every time he lays down for a nap or goes to bed for the night (though to be fair he does help me clean them up- good habit rather than developing compulsion I hope). I had such a hard time making the leap to Will feeding himself completely that ultimately Eli made the transition for me while I was gone for a week. I will strip Will of his clothes whenever I think a meal is too messy.

It is a compulsion I suppose, because when I actually stop and think about things, I tend to take a deep breath and relax. His clothes will come clean, I know. Dirt won't hurt him at all, I know. And when I take that breath, we have SO much more fun. Playing in dirt is part of learning for Will. So I am working on it. Today we played in the park and he was playing with wood chips and sand and on his hands and knees on the jungle gym having a blast. And I had such a good time watching him that when he fell on his hands and knees in a big puddle, I just laughed and told him to get up and go on. Next thing you know I will be out making mud pies with him in the yard. But I will still pick his toys up multiple times a day. Compulsions must be dealt with one step at a time.

Getting started... again.

I am under orders to post a blog today. I have a terrible time getting started again when a lot of time has passed because I feel the need to share things in chronological order. When you let months go by without sharing new info, this need to go in order makes it seem impossible to be interesting. So I am going to ignore my need for order and march on.

We have had a wonderful warm snap this past week, which is much welcomed by me and my love of light and warmth. I feel a push of energy and desire to accomplish as much as possible when I can walk outside without a jacket and see the sun shine on everything. For Will this means lots of "trips" as we call them to run errands, and visit the local park. He now regularly requests to "seeside" which for those of you who do not speak toddler, is a request to "see outside". Sometimes this is accompanied by the adorable "peasss" or "please" with a grin already developed to charm anyone within range.

Will is such a little boy now. I had the chance to help my best friend out with her new little guy a couple of weeks ago, and the stark difference between that newborn and my giant son could not be ignored. I came home and was sad to realize that I would never think he was a baby again. To top off this mental transition for me, I bit the bullet and decided with Eli that it was time to cut Will's hair. For those of you who didn't see it, my son had a glorious head of curls. It had gotten so long though that when he bathed his wet hair fell half way down his back. Baby mullet is not cute, so with a sad heart we took him to Great Clips for a real haircut.


Will just before Christmas.


Will just after his haircut.

As you can see, with a few snips of the scissors, my child went for a baby to a little boy. It was hard to watch, and I admit I shed a tear or two. However, it was time, and I don't want to fall into that trap of limiting my child because of who I want him to be rather than recognizing and enjoying who he actually is. And boy who he is right now is a hilarious, sweet, mischievous piece of work. He is learning to climb everything in sight. His vocabulary is exploding, and anything he doesn't know on his own he will happily mimic (meaning any slips of the tongue can have SERIOUS consequences). He is also so fun to watch when he is trying to figure something out. Like all toddlers, he can get emotional when a task frustrates him, but like his Daddy he is content for much longer than I would expect to trying things on his own. He has been introduced to time out, and has spent his fair share of time on the dreaded time out spot, but we are in that glorious stage where he hasn't figured out that he can protest his consequence beyond crying on that spot.

I am looking forward to more consistent warm air so he can enjoy wearing himself out in fresh air. But for now I am content to spend my time reading him the same 5 books over and over again at his demand, playing with Elmo, and chasing him around the house. If it is to be, warm weather will hopefully also bring the beginning of another pregnancy, and the journey to bringing a sibling home for this little guy to play with. Now that this first one back is over, I also hope to get back on the wagon of writing regularly. I certainly enjoy keeping up with my favorite bloggers, and feel it's time to contribute back to the pool of experiences shared.