5 Years and Proof My Husband Knows Me

In just a few shorts days, my wonderful husband and I will be celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary. It really seems crazy that we have been together for 7 1/2 years, and married for almost 5. Crazy because that time is both forever and a blink of the eye. I am so incredibly lucky that I am every bit as happy today as I was on my wedding day; happier really as our lives are so much fuller.

We have done so much and grown in a multitude of ways since we began dating. We got together the summer after college graduation; I started to make a list of some of the things we had experienced/survived together but stopped because I realized that the particulars aren't necessarily interesting to you dear readers, and regardless a list wouldn't begin to explain our experiences and history. I would imagine that most couples that have travelled more than a handful of years together happily (at least mostly) would say the same thing.

So to celebrate what we both consider our first milestone anniversary, we agreed to be a little extravagant with our gifts. We talked about general budgets and went on our merry way. I puzzled for a while over this- Eli is not particularly easy to buy for as he rarely has a burning desire for any "thing" and what items he puts on a wish list tend to be very modest. After a lot of thought I decided to get him a new subscription to satellite radio, and a pair of replacement ear buds with microphone for his Iphone. When we bought the Caliber in 2008 it came with a full year of Sirius free, but we had to let it lapse at the end of that time because we didn't feel we could afford such a luxury item. Eli had been sad to see it go, especially since we were just transitioning to the daily commute that would be keeping him in the car up to 2 hours a day. I was able to get him 15 months worth of the radio and stay within budget (yay free previews and discounts for being a return customer)!

Strangely, all through this talking and planning time, Eli never once asked me what I wanted. Even more strangely, I didn't really notice. Typically Eli will ask for my input before buying a gift. He doesn't always get the things I suggest,(which I actually really like) but he at least asks. But the time came and went and one day he just let me know he had ordered my gift and it would be arriving in a couple of days. He had it delivered to the lab so I wouldn't see it by accident if it was left on the stoop by the deliverer. Of course this lit a fire under my behind and I immediately ordered the subscription. The plan was to hold on to our gifts and actually present them to each other on this Friday. Unfortunately, in my haste to catch up with him, and the haste of the person selling me the subscription, the radio was activated the day I purchased the subscription, rather than our anniversary. I spent a fruitless 20 minutes on the phone trying to get it corrected with no success, so I told Eli we would have to exchange gifts early. He didn't seem to mind this, and in fact seemed very confident about his gift.

It was only in the day leading up to the exchange that I really started to wonder what he may have gotten me. My sister and best friend were both full of ideas- they got me so excited that I started getting nervous. I had been messing with Eli and told him that I had to go pick up his present because it had been delivered early, and I needed the Caliber and a tape measure to measure the hatch because I wasn't sure if it would fit. This really threw him for a loop. So after we put Will to bed I asked him if he wanted his present 1st or 2nd. He said first, so I made him put his shoes on and go out to the car, closing his eyes as he approached so he couldn't see anything. Once inside, I first gave him the ear buds, which he was delighted with and laughingly said could be his entire present. I told him to hush and turned the car on and the radio. He was so excited. It was probably the best gift giving I have ever done.

As we walked back into the house I was getting more and more nervous. He retrieved my gift from the basement. It was in a big black garbage bag, so I had no idea what it could be other than it obviously was somewhat heavy. Eli made me look at the ceiling while he removed the garbage bag. What I saw when I looked down made me immediately start crying- I was beyond excited. What he gave me was:



That's right dear readers, a 5 Quart Kitchen Aid Artisan Mixer!!!! I have wanted one of these since we got married! This, the Cadillac of all stand mixers, and it is mine!!! If I ever had any doubt about how well my husband knows me, and how much he really does pay attention to things (even if his short term memory isn't always the best :) ), that doubt is gone forever. This was the most thoughtful, wonderful gift he could have possibly come up with. I know that some women would consider various forms of bodily harm towards their husbands if given a kitchen appliance as an anniversary gift, but not me. This present was perfect.

The Cake

Ok, I know I have shocked you. 2 posts in one day blows way past expectations for this blog. But this has been a big week, and I have LOTS to share!

So, as mentioned in the previous post, Will's birthday was Sunday. We decided to have a party for him on Saturday the 24th. We went with a Thomas the Tank Engine theme,(one of Will's favorites) and I decided we would make individual homemade pizzas for dinner. We invited all our friends from Eli's lab, and our friends here in Festus who have a son 6 months older than Will. All-in-all I think we had a good plan. I decided we needed a festive cake to go along with the party's theme; a cake that would really make Will excited. I can tell you I succeeded in giving Will that surprise. I can also tell you I almost killed myself getting it done.

The Friday before the party, Will and I went to the St. Louis Zoo with our friend Julie and her son Jake, our frequent play date partners and good friends. Julie's father joined us and Eli even came from the office to walk around with us for a while. A good time was had by all. Julie, being the saint that she often is, offered to keep Will for me the rest of the afternoon so that I could get busy baking the cakes. I took her up on the offer and went directly home.

The cake I chose to make is from an idea on sproutonline.com. Sprout is a cable channel composed entirely of PBS shows for preschoolers. It is currently Will's only source of television, and regularly shows party and craft ideas. The cake is actually relatively simple- instead of using traditional cake pans, bake two standard size cake recipes in 12 mini loaf pans. Once baked, use 2 of the mini cakes to form Thomas (I cheated and used unrolled and stacked swiss cake rolls for the barrel of the engine), and decorate the others as train cars. Create a track out of sugar wafer cookies and crushed chocolate cookies, and top frosted train cars with candy freight. Not too bad, right?

Well I never accurately account for the time needed to put big baking projects together. I did get all the baking done on Friday afternoon with no trouble at all. I made half of the cars from a banana cake recipe that I knew Will loved. I made the other half with a great moist chocolate cake recipe- both can be found in the Better Homes and Gardens Cook Book. The banana cake got cream cheese frosting and the chocolate cake got a fluffy white frosting with a touch of orange extract. Saturday I spent the first hour I was awake doing little chores and ushering Eli and Will out of the house (Eli took Will to the Transportation Museum so I could work on the cake without interruption or chance of Will seeing it too soon). I began putting the cake together at about 9:15am. I didn't finish until almost 2:00pm. This was for a simple cake!!!

Needless to say, the party went very well. Will was so excited about everything- and didn't immediately realize he got to eat the cake. Below are some pictures of the work-in-progress and the final product.

Birthday Boy!

If you would be so kind, we will all just overlook the fact that it has been seven months since my last blog post and move on. Thank you so very much.

We celebrated my son's 2nd birthday this past weekend. It is impossible to fathom how much my life has changed in those 2 years, or how quickly that time has passed. I am so thankful that I get to be with him throughout the day; perhaps more thankful that I AM thankful at this point, because I remember all too clearly that it was not all sunshine and daisies in the beginning.

Will is, I think, a very normal 2-year-old little boy. Just like all kids his age he is ahead of the curve in some areas, and still catching up in others. We had his check-up on Monday, and he is 38" tall and weighs 31lb, 6oz. He is so far off the height chart at this point that they show us the chart, and then point to his dot way above the top percentiles. No need to say anything else. His weight is average, as is his head circumference (things you don't realize you will keep track of before becoming a parent). We assume that all this height at his age attributes to his, well, clumsiness. Of course, the Davis klutz gene can't be ignored either. He can't quite get both feet off the floor yet when trying to jump, and while his climbing has improved at a scary rate, he can still fall down in the middle of an empty room for absolutely no reason at all. His fine motor skills are improving too, but we aren't jumping ahead developmentally there either.

Where my son really shines though is in language skills. Imagine, a son of mine being a talker!! At 24 months they want to see him putting at least 2 words together. Will has been putting 3 and 4 words together for several months now, and even goes for a 5 word phrase once in a great while. The funny thing about this though is that unless you are around him all the time you would never know how much he talks. In public my son turns into his father- quiet and observant until he feels comfortable, which can take a while. Once he finally lets loose, he usually surprises the people around him.

We have had so much fun with Will, and it just keeps getting better. He waits for his Daddy to come home so they can go play in the backyard or the car. He loves playing with his fire truck or school bus, but also loves to cuddle his puppy or teddy bear. He is experiencing those wild swings in mood and emotion that often result in the dreaded tantrum, but thankfully they are usually brief and handled without too much trouble. On the rare occasion when he truly loses control of his emotions he seems as much confused as to why he can't calm down as anything else.

We have also entered the phase where he wants to make all his own decisions. This one is hard for me, mostly because I have been so accustom to his laid back personality. Now I have to remember to present things to him in such a way that he feels he gets a choice, which when you are in a hurry isn't always easy. He wants to be independent so badly, and boy what a tug-o-war that can be for a Momma. We are working through it just like everything else.

I am so looking forward to what this next year brings. Of course, I am also worried too. We have some big milestones to get through in the not too distant future, including potty training and a big boy bed. I get the worry lines on my forehead just thinking about that. But it seems like every big worry looks so silly in retrospect, so I know we will get through it all with a happy little guy.

Filling in the Branches of the Family Tree

(I should preface this entry with a confession: My on-again status regarding my family tree is due entirely to the fact that I am so easily swayed by things on television. Eli swears I should be a marketing test subject, because I respond so strongly. NBC has started showing a new season of "Who Do You Think You Are" which is basically one long commercial for www.ancestry.com and after the first episode I immediately jumped on and started filling out a tree. I have promised myself that if I make enough progress on my own I will purchase a one month subscription so I can actually see and print all the documents I am searching through.)


Since my early teen years I have held an on again, off again interest in my family tree. I have always loved history (eventually deciding to minor rather than major in the subject in college once political science had wooed me away) and exploration of the family tree is a very personal way to experience history. I shared this genealogical interest with my Great Aunt Corinna, sister to my Gran, and someone I honestly didn't spend much time with. However, when she learned of my interest, she was pleased enough to share what I consider to be treasured documents with me. Through much hard work and many hours of combing through records, Aunt Corinna had compiled a a family tree (well specifically one very long branch) of her father's (my great grandfather's) line. And by very long, I mean the the first entries date back to 1146 ad.

I know, it seems hard to believe. Certainly hard to believe that one could trace their heritage back accurately to such a distant point in history. But it seems that such things happen more than I would have suspected. In the case of this branch, accuracy can be depended upon because this branch had historical significance. I was told Aunt Corinna went no further back than William Marshall of England because she believed he was an orphan. My recent research reveals that in fact there is a record of William Marshall's parents, and I am excited to start researching a bit further back.

So who is William Marshall? Well, according to multiple sources, "Sir William Marshal, 1st Earl of Pembroke (1146 – 14 May 1219), also called William the Marshal (Guillaume le Maréchal), was an Anglo-Norman soldier and statesman. He was described as the "greatest knight that ever lived" by Stephen Langton. He served four kings — Henry II, Richard the Lionheart, John and Henry III — and rose from obscurity to become a regent of England for the last of the four, and so, one of the most powerful men in Europe. Before him, the hereditary title of "Marshal" designated head of household security for the king of England; by the time he died, people throughout Europe (not just England) referred to him simply as "the Marshal"." Specific to me, he was my great (x29) grandfather. Yes grandfather 29 generations back.

This is very exciting for me, since I particularly love English history, but also because it makes following the family tree down to my grandmother's family much easier because the children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, and on down the line of William Marshall were members of the royal family or at least members of Court. They married other noblemen and noblewomen, and essentially kept themselves in the record books for long enough that by the time history stopped caring about them we have come forward enough in time that Aunt Corinna could and I can verify their offspring easily by more conventional methods.

Having such a huge head start on one branch of my tree has motivated me to learn as much about the rest of my family as I can. This will be much harder work though for two reasons; first, I have no one forging ahead of me to give me so much to go on, and second, estrangements on both sides of my family (some before my time and others involving me) make it hard to get information that normally you could just call an older family member up and ask about.

Despite those obstacles, I have made some progress. I have learning things in conversation with my father and grandfather that I never knew. I have found that my paternal great great grandmother used to be a telephone operator in the old switchboard days. I have learned I have many farmers in my family, on both sides, and a few coal miners too. I have learned that distant relations on my mother's side helped to form the state of Maryland. All of it is fascinating to me. Everything from the knights to the miners is a little piece of my history. I cannot wait to find out more.

P.S. If I can figure out how to make an image you can actually see, I will post a picture of the hand-written tree my Great Aunt Corinna gave me all those years ago. It is beautiful, and a testament to the hard work she did to provide this information for our family. It is several feet long and all done it tiny, perfect script.

Dirt

Boys get dirty. Little boys seem to make their top priority finding any kind of dirt or mess and covering themselves in as much of it as possible. It isn't to say little girls don't get dirty too. I never had a brand new pair of white tennis shoes that didn't find a huge mud puddle within days (sometimes hours) of purchase. If there was a puddle within a 100 feet of me, I would manage to fall into it. Craft time meant paint, glue and glitter on the elbows of my shirts and somewhere on my pants. But I would argue that my dirt interaction as a little girl was more a by product of my play or lack of attention on my part, where as with little boys (and specifically my son) dirt seems to be the aim from the get-go. Playtime is what happens when you busy making a mess.

Turns out I am a bit of control freak about messes. (NO! Say it ain't so- not you! Yeah yeah...) If going purely on instinct I would have a wet wipe always in my hand and my son would be playing outside wrapped in plastic. He would have come out of the womb knowing how to use utensils and place his napkin neatly in his lap. And I don't get it. I am not a super neat person. I am controlling and want to be the boss of many, many things- but I wouldn't consider neatness to be high on that list. I was a horrible slob as a child. My room was the stuff of legend. But somehow with the birth of this child, a switch has been flipped. I clean his toys up every time he lays down for a nap or goes to bed for the night (though to be fair he does help me clean them up- good habit rather than developing compulsion I hope). I had such a hard time making the leap to Will feeding himself completely that ultimately Eli made the transition for me while I was gone for a week. I will strip Will of his clothes whenever I think a meal is too messy.

It is a compulsion I suppose, because when I actually stop and think about things, I tend to take a deep breath and relax. His clothes will come clean, I know. Dirt won't hurt him at all, I know. And when I take that breath, we have SO much more fun. Playing in dirt is part of learning for Will. So I am working on it. Today we played in the park and he was playing with wood chips and sand and on his hands and knees on the jungle gym having a blast. And I had such a good time watching him that when he fell on his hands and knees in a big puddle, I just laughed and told him to get up and go on. Next thing you know I will be out making mud pies with him in the yard. But I will still pick his toys up multiple times a day. Compulsions must be dealt with one step at a time.

Getting started... again.

I am under orders to post a blog today. I have a terrible time getting started again when a lot of time has passed because I feel the need to share things in chronological order. When you let months go by without sharing new info, this need to go in order makes it seem impossible to be interesting. So I am going to ignore my need for order and march on.

We have had a wonderful warm snap this past week, which is much welcomed by me and my love of light and warmth. I feel a push of energy and desire to accomplish as much as possible when I can walk outside without a jacket and see the sun shine on everything. For Will this means lots of "trips" as we call them to run errands, and visit the local park. He now regularly requests to "seeside" which for those of you who do not speak toddler, is a request to "see outside". Sometimes this is accompanied by the adorable "peasss" or "please" with a grin already developed to charm anyone within range.

Will is such a little boy now. I had the chance to help my best friend out with her new little guy a couple of weeks ago, and the stark difference between that newborn and my giant son could not be ignored. I came home and was sad to realize that I would never think he was a baby again. To top off this mental transition for me, I bit the bullet and decided with Eli that it was time to cut Will's hair. For those of you who didn't see it, my son had a glorious head of curls. It had gotten so long though that when he bathed his wet hair fell half way down his back. Baby mullet is not cute, so with a sad heart we took him to Great Clips for a real haircut.


Will just before Christmas.


Will just after his haircut.

As you can see, with a few snips of the scissors, my child went for a baby to a little boy. It was hard to watch, and I admit I shed a tear or two. However, it was time, and I don't want to fall into that trap of limiting my child because of who I want him to be rather than recognizing and enjoying who he actually is. And boy who he is right now is a hilarious, sweet, mischievous piece of work. He is learning to climb everything in sight. His vocabulary is exploding, and anything he doesn't know on his own he will happily mimic (meaning any slips of the tongue can have SERIOUS consequences). He is also so fun to watch when he is trying to figure something out. Like all toddlers, he can get emotional when a task frustrates him, but like his Daddy he is content for much longer than I would expect to trying things on his own. He has been introduced to time out, and has spent his fair share of time on the dreaded time out spot, but we are in that glorious stage where he hasn't figured out that he can protest his consequence beyond crying on that spot.

I am looking forward to more consistent warm air so he can enjoy wearing himself out in fresh air. But for now I am content to spend my time reading him the same 5 books over and over again at his demand, playing with Elmo, and chasing him around the house. If it is to be, warm weather will hopefully also bring the beginning of another pregnancy, and the journey to bringing a sibling home for this little guy to play with. Now that this first one back is over, I also hope to get back on the wagon of writing regularly. I certainly enjoy keeping up with my favorite bloggers, and feel it's time to contribute back to the pool of experiences shared.